Session Overview#
The party experiences a surreal dream sequence where they’re transformed into cooking ingredients and forced to participate in a deadly cooking show competition hosted by Crowley and judged by mysterious entities. This combat-heavy session features food-themed enemies and arena-style battles with cooking puns and culinary chaos.
The Dream Transformation#
Falling Into the Dream#
After settling in for the evening at a tavern, the party falls into an unnaturally deep sleep. They awaken bound and gagged in what appears to be a kitchen, having been shrunk down to ingredient size. Each party member discovers they’ve been transformed into food items with special abilities:
Food Transformations:
- Bru : Fermented Garlic Bulb - Bold, stinky, aged to perfection and packing a punch
- Elspeth : Spiced Turnip Root - Humble, earthy root with a sharp kick
- Jasper : Cured Wyvern Jerky - Wrinkly, meat-smelling, tough and preserved
- Silas : Ashen Hell Pepper - Scorched with black veins, grown in volcanic soil, causes hallucinations
- Helisanna : Aged Moon Milk Cheese - Fine like wine, complex and aromatic
- Olivia : Celestial Prawn of the Ninth Sea - The most special ingredient (rolled highest)
The Cooking Show Setup#
The party finds themselves in a twisted cooking competition with three judges:
- Crowley: The familiar fae antagonist, clearly enjoying their torment
- The Blob: A mysterious entity
- Mrs. Universe: An ethereal concept of a being (not specifically about beauty)
An unseen announcer introduces the deadly cooking contest where “the players are the ingredients.”
Round One: The Wok Arena#
Combat in the Giant Wok#
The first challenge takes place in a massive wok pan with fires raging around the outside. The party faces:
Primary Enemy: Chili Basil Golem - A large, tough creature resembling Graveler or Golem, made of spices and covered in green oil
Secondary Enemies: Two Spice Weasels - Small beast creatures that smell of cayenne pepper and leave trails of paprika dust when injured
Combat Highlights#
Opening Assault: Helisanna dominates with Eldritch Blast, knocking the golem back and dealing fire damage as it bounces off the wok sides.
Coordinated Attacks: The party demonstrates excellent teamwork:
- Olivia delivers devastating blows with her battle axe and Divine Smite
- Silas eliminates enemies with precision psychic dagger strikes
- Bru provides artillery support with his Eldritch Cannon
- Elspeth contributes consistent damage despite lacking her usual equipment
Environmental Hazards: As the combat progresses, the wok begins heating up, forcing dexterity saves to avoid fire damage from falling vegetables and hot surfaces.
Finishing Moves: Olivia and Jasper coordinate to deliver the killing blow to the chili basil golem through spectacular teamwork.
Round Two: La Cocina Combativa#
The Colosseum Arena#
The second round moves to an Italian-themed Colosseum with marinara sauce replacing lava in a checkerboard pattern. The arena features:
- Red marinara “lava” squares that deal fire damage
- Obstacles in the form of rolling meatballs
- Various sauce types with different effects flooding the gutters
The Rescue Mission#
Red ’s Predicament: Silas spots their missing party member Red , transformed into a red leek, bound and unconscious on a crostini (small bread) at the far end of the arena.
The Bomb Threat: Olivia investigates the area and discovers a pit bomb (olive with explosives) hidden behind the crostini with a burning wick.
Kevin’s Sacrifice: Bru ’s homunculus Kevin attempts to defuse the bomb but fails spectacularly, resulting in his explosion. The announcer assures everyone Kevin is safe but “out of the running” for now.
The Pasta Hydra Battle#
Main Antagonist: A massive Pasta Hydra emerges through a hole blown in the Colosseum wall - a spaghetti and noodle-based creature with five heads that grows more heads when damaged.
Supporting Enemies: Olive Assassins (black and green olives) positioned in the arena’s upper seating areas, firing arrows at the party.
Epic Combat Sequence#
Multi-Front Battle: The party faces threats from multiple directions:
- Silas climbs to the upper levels to engage olive assassins with spectacular knife throws
- Olivia , Jasper , and Bru engage the pasta hydra in melee combat
- Helisanna and Elspeth provide ranged support
Hydra Mechanics: The creature demonstrates classic hydra behavior - when heads are severed, two grow back in their place, escalating from five heads to eventually ten heads during the battle.
Critical Moments:
- Olivia gets her axe stuck in the creature but rips it free with determination
- Jasper demonstrates incredible luck with multiple critical hits throughout the combat
- Silas saves Helisanna from a green olive assassin with precise dagger throws
Final Victory: Silas delivers the killing blow by throwing a psychic dagger down the creature’s throat, causing it to slice through the hydra from the inside.
Judge Reactions and Intermission#
After each round, the judges provide feedback:
Round One:
- The Blob: Found the meal “very delicious”
- Miss Universe: “It was okay”
- Crowley: “I expect more if you’re going to make it”
Round Two:
- The Blob: “I found the meal to be very delicious, actually”
- Miss Universe: “I’m usually not a big fan, but I liked it”
- Crowley: “It was… Edible. It was okay.”
Character Development and Combat Performance#
Team Coordination#
The party demonstrates excellent tactical coordination despite being transformed and lacking some equipment:
- Effective use of flanking positions
- Creative environmental interactions (using wok physics for extra damage)
- Coordinated rescue operations
- Strategic positioning and spell usage
Equipment Adaptations#
Players adapt to their transformed states:
- Silas can still create psychic daggers
- Olivia maintains her battle axe (apparently sleeping with it)
- Elspeth shoots “toothpicks” instead of bolts for flavor
- Spell abilities remain largely intact
Session Themes and Style#
Culinary Combat#
The session maintains a consistent food theme throughout:
- Enemies are cooking ingredients (chili basil golem, spice weasels, pasta hydra)
- Environmental hazards are cooking-related (hot wok, sauce types)
- Combat descriptions use cooking terminology and puns
- Arena designs reflect kitchen equipment and dining settings
Dream Logic#
The surreal nature of the dream allows for:
- Impossible transformations
- Physics that follow cooking metaphors
- Absurd but internally consistent rules
- Crowley’s continued psychological torment
Session Conclusion and Feedback#
DM Learning Experience#
Zack acknowledges this was primarily a combat-focused session and receives feedback about the need for more roleplay elements. The session serves as a learning experience for balancing combat and narrative elements.
Technical Notes#
The session runs longer than expected due to:
- Multiple complex combat encounters
- Online play moving slower than in-person
- Detailed environmental interactions
- Extended tactical discussions
Future Planning#
The session ends with the party still in the dream scenario, setting up for potential continuation with more roleplay-focused content. Zack indicates plans to extend the experience into a more balanced adventure combining combat with character interaction.
Notable Combat Mechanics#
Food-Themed Abilities#
Each transformed character gains special abilities related to their food type, though these aren’t fully explored in the combat-heavy session.
Environmental Storytelling#
The cooking show format provides a framework for creative combat scenarios while maintaining thematic consistency throughout multiple encounter types.
Hydra Challenge#
The pasta hydra encounter demonstrates how classic D&D monsters can be reimagined with creative theming while maintaining their essential mechanical challenges.
This interlude showcases the campaign’s willingness to experiment with unusual scenarios while maintaining the party’s core dynamic and Crowley’s ongoing antagonistic presence in their adventures.